“Clem” Custom-shaped pillow

Sir Roary Clementine the Benevolent™
Custom-Shaped Pillow of Emotional Authority

There are pillows, and then there is Clem.
Not so much an object as an experience, Clem arrives not in packaging, but in prophecy. Crowned in royal indigo and flanked by two roses that were absolutely not grown in your garden, Clem reigns supreme over all things soft, silent, and sublimely validating.

He is:
– Keeper of the Velvet Throne (read: your couch)
– Wielder of the Subtle Hug (ideal for crisis naps)
– Ruler of Quiet Emotional Dominance and Floral Aesthetic (the only monarchy that matters)

Crafted for those who have known heartbreak and also have a Pinterest board titled “Regal Whimsy,” Clem is the perfect companion for:
• Whispered confessions
• Crying at commercials
• Reclining dramatically
• Nightly existential recalibrations

To earn his affection, you must kneel, weep (just a little), and offer snacks (he’s partial to symbolic cheese cubes). Once bonded, Clem will never leave your side—unless you wash him in hot water, and then you’re on your own, traitor.

So go ahead. Hug the monarchy. You’ve earned it.

“Clem doesn’t care, and that’s why you trust him.”

• 100% soft polyester
• 3 sizes available: S 10″ × 10″ (25.4 × 25.4 cm), M 16″ × 16″ (40.6 × 40.6 cm), L 22″ × 22″ (55.8 × 55.8 cm)
• Thickness: 3″–5″(7.6–12.7 cm)
• Print on one side, color white on the other side
• Sealed design without zipper
• Blank product sourced from the USA

Spot wash with warm water.

Important: This product is available in the US only. If your shipping address is outside this region, please choose a different product.